How do YOU re-open?
I write this in the midst of a unique and a pivotal moment as in many place, we’re in a time of “re-opening.” The people I connect with in my personal life and through teaching are feeling all kinds of ways about the thought of re-opening, which has been described as “creating a new normal” or even “going back to the life we had before.
In this special moment, it can be beneficial to take a look back, to feel into the present moment, and to look ahead to the future. The practice below is one that I came to organically as I felt into my own fears and intentions for this moment. After walking myself through a reflection, I realized that it fit into what we’re talking about this month within Flourish & Bloom Collective, so I shaped it and shared it with our small community.
It seems like everyday, I keep hearing people talk around this, expressing uncertainty about how to move forward, relief at coming home to certain elements of “before,” fear about the expectations and requests that are beginning to come their way… and so I want to share this with you, in case you need some space to process right now, too.
This reflection exercise doesn’t need to be done in one sit-down — you might take one question to work with and then continue on another day. After all, these are big and meaningful questions! Remember: throughout the past year, each of us has been through significant change, stress, and uncertainty, as well as growth, beauty, and resilience.
Being human means constant adaptation and change, so personally, I don’t connect with the language of “going back.” I feel that we move into the next moment as new people who hold new knowledge, experiences, and emotions… so we step freshly into each situation and relationship, even when they happen to resemble situations and relationships from “before.”
We enter, in every moment, into life as who we are now, and we have permission to feel, speak, behave, and be different than before.
🌸 Katie
With the following questions, give yourself plenty of time to reflect, to write, to talk through with a friend, or try a walk-and-talk with a voice memo recorder.
Noticing Change
How did my life change during 2020?
(work, social life, family life, personal life, use of time, hobbies, use of financial resources…)
What surprised me about the time of lockdown?
What changes were hard? What did I not like? What did I grieve the loss of?
What do I want to return to when it’s safe to do so?
What changes felt right to my soul, good for my health?
What do I wish to continue doing, how do I wish to continue being… or even take further?
Investigating Fear
When I think about and hear about “re-opening,” where do I find fear and discomfort arising?
How are these fears related to… Physical safety? To not knowing? To habit and change? To own needs, preferences, and comfort level?
Considering Boundaries
As we move toward a more physically open and close way of life, this is a perfect opportunity to pause and be intentional. Rather than “what is my community asking for?”, “what is my government saying is ok?”, “what are people expecting?” the questions are:
What life do I wish for? What situations do I wish to be part of?
This is related to boundaries, and when we set boundaries, we first need to be clear about our yeses and nos, then be willing to communicate them, then hold to them.
In order to live the life that we wish to live, we need to take the time to actually establish: What is okay with me? What is not okay with me? What do I wish for? What do I stand against?
If we don't do that, it's all too easy to suddenly find ourselves doing things we didn’t intend to do, being asked to do things and then having to make hard decisions on the fly. (Of course, we are capable of making hard decisions on the fly, but it sure helps to know our own boundaries in advance!)
