100 Days of Ocean Dips: Infusing Life with Beauty, Meaning, and Intentionality
It’s later than I had wanted to come to the beach, but as it turns out, the timing is perfect for my 100th ocean dip. As I walk toward the water, the sun is heading toward the hill to the west, the sky is going pastel. I’m up to my waist, and the water is so smooth it almost seems thick, here and there the silver flash of an anchovy lurching out of the water for a fraction of a second.
I’m up to my shoulders when I hear a soft exhale, and somehow I know who will be there before I turn to look: harbor seal, my frequent companion, dark eyes meeting mine before going under. I see the water ripple in front of me as she passes to come up again on the other side.
It seems impossible that I began getting into the water daily back in July… and now it’s October.
Why did I begin, and why am I stopping now?
I began because I was feeling aimless and troubled. Truths were making themselves known to me, big questions arising: What am I doing with my life, my habits, my time? Is it working for me? If not, what can I do about that?
Getting in the ocean everyday was a way of kickstarting daily habits, a way of proving to myself that I can do something consistently—something not always comfortable, something that might be inconvenient—just because I said I will do it and because it is important to me.
Getting in the ocean everyday was a way of being intentional and self-directed: choosing the specific ingredients in my life that spark wonder and joy for me, rather than succumbing to the banality of being on my phone or some other easy and unintentional habit.
And, though I wouldn’t have known to say it at the time, getting in the ocean everyday was a way of creating a huge and powerful container (the Ocean!) to work through feelings and ideas that needed to be processed.
I am stopping now, in essence, because it worked. This daily ritual has been a cornerstone throughout a transformative period of my life.
What has happened in 100 days?
In the daily rhythm of putting on a swimming suit, walking to the beach, and so on—whether or not I felt like it—I got used to saying yes to what I had committed to, and no to what no longer felt like me.
This rippled outward to other areas: I started going to the gym and to a swim class, and discovered that movement can be a means of generating energy and a good mood. Who knew?! I discovered that some of the days when I didn’t want to go to the ocean, days of cool gray mist, for example, were some of the most magical and meaningful days to be there, alone up to my neck in the cold water but for the diving pelicans. Committed.
During this 100 days, I’ve gotten moving in larger ways, moving purposefully toward what matters to me. I went from not knowing quite what to do next in my career to definitive steps in a new direction. Next week, I’m starting graduate school to be a Marriage and Family Therapist. Going back to school at 42, opting into schooling and training that will last four or more years and cost quite a bit of money wasn’t an easy decision, but it is a decision that feels solid and right.
Along the way, Ocean has received my tears when I felt lost. Ocean has helped me release what I can no longer hold, in the form of stones gracefully slipping from my fingers, and sometimes stones hurled with a vengeance and a splash. Ocean has helped me embody surrender, my arms moving with each wave that passes, flowing with what is. Here it comes; there it goes. Like it or not.
The End of this Ritual
When I began this ritual, I hoped to last 30 days. And then I just kept going. At about day 80, I started to get pretty tired of the “have to” of it, but I wanted to end as intentionally as I began, so I decided to stop at 100 days—because the experiment worked, and because I’m ready for something different.
There are many ways that I love to immerse in the outdoors, and while ocean dips are one of them, the migrating birds are calling me, my bike is calling me, walks by the shore are calling me. I’m ready to let the rhythm of each day guide my nature exploration. And I know that as I start school, my schedule will be different, and there are other priorities I’ll need to keep.
The question I’m asking myself is, what is my keystone habit now? What is my north star to keep this reminder of commitment and intentionality? I’m feeling this out as I step into the next era, in the same way I step carefully into the water, over and around large rocks, timing my steps with the crash of the waves. What I know is: I will continue to create a life that is uniquely nourishing and special to me. I will continue to seek the sacred by going outdoors and paying attention.
I savored the last three dips, making them extra special. For dip #98 I made a mandala on the beach, placing stones, shells, seaweed, flowers, and sticks in a pleasing pattern that will eventually scatter, inspired by my new friend Meg and the practice of Morning Altars.
For dip #99, I changed the location. I brought my swimsuit on a hike with my husband at Point Lobos and dipped in a new-to-me cove, feeling smooth round stones and sandstone slabs underfoot instead of sand, views from the water of the ocher cliffs, a sense of newness and curiosity as I entered the Ocean at a different spot.
Back where we began this writing, at dip #100, the sunset brought its own magic, and afterward, I made a cozy little fire and sipped warm spiced apple cider as night fell, a quiet celebration (the best kind, in my opinion).
These special dips highlighted one more learning from this 100-day journey: We can infuse our lives with meaning and beauty much more than we do, most times. There is no shortage of beauty, only sometimes a want of attention and creativity. I am learning this.
The peace of the calm beach at sunset is magical and as I’m submerged in the water, I’m feeling a sense of pressure — what else should I do, say to mark this 100th dip? I’ve spent more than a quarter of the year, a season, committed to this ritual. And while this 100th time feels like an achievement, I also know I don’t need to force some extra something to happen. Being present in the cool smooth water is enough. Being here under a pastel sky with Harbor Seal is more than enough. The infinite learnings and experiences of these 100 days are enough.
And what’s more, this is not goodbye. Immersing in Ocean nourishes every part of me, and I know I will continue to get into the water—not every day, but often. There is something here that moves me.
What nourishes you? What ingredient could be in your life that would inspire and ground you? These are what poet David Whyte might call "beautiful questions" — the kind of questions that are never totally answered, but asking them with curiosity can be powerful.
Before I close:
Those of us in Flourish & Bloom Collective are loving our new format that combines meditation, outdoor exploration, discussion, and more. Check it out below — maybe it's one of those ingredients?
I'm wishing you the courage and capacity to cultivate meaning and beauty in your life,
🌊 Katie
A new session of Flourish & Bloom Collective begins in August! We meet via Zoom on Thursday mornings, 9-10 am Pacific, to connect, practice, and learn together. Format for each month’s calls:
Week 1: Connection with Self and Others - grounding meditation, council sharing, discussion
Week 2: Inspiration - grounding meditation, discussion of thematic poem, article, video, etc.
Week 3: Practice & Reflection - extended meditation session (or other modality such as gentle movement), reflection and journaling, sharing and discussion
Week 4: Connection with the Outdoors - audio call outdoors, mindful breathing, walking, sensory activation, nature meditation, council sharing